Counting Gwevin
by Skylark Evanson
Summary: A short mix of some Counting Crows songs that didn't make the cut for my two other Gwevin-centric songfic stories.
1. You Can't Count On Me

**A/N: I guess this is the band that really makes me write all the depressing stuff. I adore Counting Crows' music. It makes me want to sit there and cry to it all night. I love it. A shorter series of Gwevin to Counting Crows' music. Should consist of 3 songs, all in Kevin's POV.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the song nor the characters.**

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**You Can't Count On Me**

We linger together under the night sky. The lake's lapping waters eat away at the shore with soft sounds that touch my ears like the purring of a kitten. I can't help but feel so relaxed. And I know this is all too good to be true. I know this is wrong. I know it's not right for me to live so peacefully for so long. I can't have this kind of life. It's not allowed. She shouldn't be able to rely on me like this.

Our fingers are twined together as she snuggles into my chest. A piece of grass is hanging in her hair, the little blade shining emerald against her fiery scarlet mane. I love her. I love her so deeply. So deeply that it hurts.

The moon shimmers like a diamond in the night air. I love the way its light reflects off her pale, porcelain skin. It makes her look like a little china doll. I love her. I love her so much. This feels too right. I'm not supposed to know what love is. I'm not supposed to be able to love. I'm not supposed to know all this stuff. I'm not worth her time. I'm not reliable. I'm not worthy of her.

"You're tense," she says, her face burying itself deeper in my chest. I can feel the heat flushing to her face as she can hear my heart racing and beating in my chest. "What's on your mind, Kevin?" Gwen's voice is so soft. I love her. I love her too much for my own good.

So innocent, that's her. She is the picture of perfection. She could be a model or a rocket scientist. She could have the smartest, nicest, richest guy in Bellwood. She could have anyone she wants. She could do anything in this world. She could have anything she wants and I can't give her everything she needs and deserves. I can't be that perfect guy for the perfect girl.

"Gwen," I breathe after drinking in some of the brisk night air. I tighten my grip around her waist, hoping to keep her warm against the chill. She takes it as a comfort and curls against me a little more. "I just…." I keep my eyes on the moon even when her perfect jade orbs look to me curiously. "I just want you to know that you can't count on me, Gwen. That's all. I'm not trustworthy. And I don't deserve you."

A smile possesses her perfect features and I see a glimmer of laughter in her emerald eyes that twinkle even more in the moonlight's bright white shine. "Kevin, stop," she says, moving so that our faces are closer together. She's practically looking down at me and I'm fine with that. I like looking into those gorgeous eyes of hers. They're so beautiful, just like she is. "I love you. That's all that I need to know."

"I'm too prone to getting caught up in everything." I want to tear my gaze away from hers, but she's got me locked in so deep that I can hardly think of actually looking away from her beauty. "I'm dangerous." I reach up to stroke her cheek with the back of my hand. It feels so soft. It's good to feel human skin again. I like knowing that we're both alive and human, despite my imperfections and her eternal brilliance. "I won't always be around, Gwen." Her smile is quietly fading on her lips, slowly but surely, it's dying. "You can't count on me."

"Stop saying that." The pad of her thumb runs along my skin, tracing my jaw line tenderly with that gentle touch of hers. She's so beautiful. She's so perfect. I love her too much. It's getting harder to resist. I shouldn't be in love. I don't deserve love. "You're fine, Kevin. I believe in you. And Ben believes in you. That's plenty to know that you'll be fine. We trust you with our lives."

My throat closed up. I'm a danger to her and her cousin. I'm a killer, a murderer. I'm nothing whereas they are everything. I shouldn't have been close to them at all. Now I was wading into dangerous waters.

The trees rustle over us and I keep letting my skin brush against hers. It's so soft and she's so sweet and so perfect. I love her. I truly love her.

"Gwen, please don't trust me," I plead softly. "Please don't believe in me." I can't help but notice how sad she looks when I say those words. It's like they truly pierce her soul. I hate hurting her. Hurting her hurts me both physically and mentally. "I don't deserve anything."

Once more, she lets herself lay across my chest. Her arms are around my torso; it's a comfort just to know she's there. I silently watch the moon as it floats in the dark sky. "Kevin, you've redeemed yourself." Her face is buried in my chest and she's so warm and so beautiful and she's so perfect. She's too perfect for me. "Stop being so pessimistic."

My mindset still doesn't change, but I kiss her crown of crimson hair. I gently finger a few stray strands of it, feeling it run between my fingertips more like silk than hair. I can't believe her. She's so unreal. Everything I feel for her hasn't existed in me for the longest time. I closed myself off from everything and now finally, I was able to open up. But she shouldn't have relied on me. She can't count on me.

"Gwen, I won't always be here for you." I keep stroking her beautiful mane. It's like fire in the darkness. "One of these days, you'll be hurt and I won't be able to be here to save you. I'll be in trouble and you'll be here." She shifts her position lying across my body, but she hasn't brought her gorgeous gaze to meet my own. "I don't want to have you hurt because you trusted me too much." I feel this throbbing in my chest; it's the longing for love and for trust. I hate being such a worthless being. "You can't count on me to be here for all the time."

"I will anyways, Kevin."

A little fury bubbles in my veins and I can't help but wish that she wouldn't put so much faith in me. Faith is something that I have little of, little for myself and barely anything for others. I was putting my heart into her and I knew she couldn't always be there for me when I was getting myself in trouble and I didn't want her to think that I was always going to be around. Honestly, I'm just waiting for the day when my parole officer comes around to take me back to the Null Void. I'm just waiting. "Please. Don't."

It hurts to know that someone could actually care about me and that I may be incapable to give the same emotions back. I'm afraid that maybe this love isn't love but that it's lust. I'm afraid that I don't know what I'm doing. I can only feel for Gwen and I don't know what I'm feeling for her. She's so beautiful and I want to know what I really do feel for her.

"Kevin, I love you," she whispers. She still isn't looking at me. It doesn't bother me. I don't need to read her eyes to know what she's thinking. Her voice gives it all away. She's afraid I'm going to leave her. I just know. I know Gwen. I love her. I love her so much it hurts. Love hurts and I love the hurt. Pain is my drug.

I keep playing with her hair, being as innocent as a newborn child. I know I'm not going to leave her unless someone drags me away. I'll fight even then. I'm willing to do anything for her. But I don't deserve her. I don't belong with her. My heart's home is here, but my body always belongs somewhere else. It belongs in a prison far away from civilization where it can't hurt anyone when I lose control. I don't want to hurt Gwen, but I don't want to leave her. I'm torn, but I know what she needs to know.

"You can't count on me, Gwen."

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**A/N: I like how it came out. Reviews are gladly appreciated.**

**~Sky**


	2. When I Dream of Michelangelo

**A/N: Just remembered that I started this a while ago and figured that I needed to write another chapter. May or may not finish it tonight. Anyways, here goes nothing. Based sometime after the first episode of Alien Force. Just like between it and the second one, but not set between the halves of the first episode. After the whole thing.**

**Edited because I was threatened to be reported for my songfics. So lyrics have been taken off, but title is still the name of the song.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Ben 10's character or this song. Song is by Counting Crows and Ben 10 is owned by MOA.**

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**When I Dream of Michelangelo**

"Why did you and Ben decide to take me in?" I ask as I take her home. Ben got me to take him back to his place. It was a thing of trust. He trusted me to know where he lives. It's hard to know that I'm a criminal and that these two innocent heroes are trusting me to watch their backs. I don't like Gwen really and I'm not the biggest fan of her cousin, but I'll deal as long as I have to. The whole Plumber's badge is big for me and I have an opportunity to save the world here. It's something my dad would've liked me to do. Maybe not _exactly_ save the world, but at least help people. Ben and Gwen were giving me that opportunity.

Gwen looks at me, jade eyes curious. "You think we're doing this for personal benefit?" After I give her a wary stare, she sighs heavily and sinks into the backseat even further. Ben had been in the passenger seat and she hadn't moved from the back to the front. I let her stay there. I wasn't about to ask her to get closer to me. "Kevin, really, we could take care of things on our own."

A thin smile touches my lips like an old friend, pricking up the corners of my mouth. "After today, I don't believe that." I check for her expression in the rearview mirror and let's just say that it's hilarious to see her face when she's caught between flustered and angry. It's kind of cute. But I shouldn't be thinking that, now should I? It's a temporary thing, being with the Tennysons.

"We could've taken them without you," she huffs and folds her arms neatly across her chest, eyes slicing from watching my expression in the mirrors to staring out the side windows; the whole thing is kind of ruined since she's sitting in the middle of the car. It would be better if she were on the sides and staring out the window. It doesn't make sense to stare out the windows if you're in the middle. "I'm sure we could've."

She's playing my nerves like a piano, but I won't give in. "Mhm," I mutter sarcastically, just loud enough for her to hear me. "Of course you could've." I know she'll get mad and that's what I'm banking on. I don't want her to be happy with me. I don't want to be her friend. I don't want to grow attached.

"You doubt me and Ben?" she asks, the words like venom rolling off her tongue. The way she gets mad is enough to make me excited to see her mad. It gives me the kind of rush I like. "You don't think we're cool enough to run with you?" She cocks her head to one side and gives me that challenging look that makes me want to turn around and show her how smug I'm being. The chick is crazy, I swear, but I'll bask in every second of it.

I give the smallest shrug, trying not to care. I don't want to grow an attachment. I can't start to like being with people. It'd ruin everything I built up around me in the world. It'd ruin my defenses. I want something normal, something easy, something I'm used to. I don't want things to change now just because I met a pretty girl and a guy who could potentially be a friend for me.

Things won't change.

"Here," she says, dragging me from my thoughts, pointing to the big house in the neighborhood she had told me to go to as Ben was getting out of the car earlier. Her finger sweeps across my vision and the house I'm looking at is like a small mansion. It's nothing compared to what I could ever imagine. It's quaint but big. That must be her lifestyle. "This is my house. Just pull to the curb and I can get out."

I do as she says, not because she told me to though. Just because it seems like a good idea and because I agree with her. I stick the car in park and she's beginning to get out in the back. "Thanks for bringing me home."

Without saying a word, I blink at her as a response and she's out of the car in a few seconds. Before I have the chance to pull away, she reopens the passenger door and shoves a piece of paper towards me. "Here," she says with those perfect green orbs trained on me.

"What is it?" I ask, taking it from her with two fingers and unfolding it to see numbers scrawled across it in neat handwriting. The dread sinks in and I realize something. I've dug my own grave.

"It's my number," she says, pulling a few strands of fiery crimson hair that hang in her face over her shoulder and out of the way of her glistening emerald gaze. "You should be able to reach me if you need to. I could give you Ben's too, if you want it."

I shake my head. "Nah, I'm good." I won't tell her that I don't have a phone. I'll just call her from the payphones or something if I really have to. "I could always call you and you could call him. Doesn't matter."

"Okay. Goodnight, Kevin." She closes the door behind her and makes her way up the sidewalk to the front door of her house before disappearing inside.

And I just know that my whole life is going to change because of those Tennysons.

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**A/N: So I'm happy with how it turned out. Shorter, yes, but I like it. Reviews are appreciated! Thanks for reading!**

**~Sky**


	3. Accidentally in Love

**A/N: I am currently curled up with this dog that we've been babysitting for my neighbors for Spring Break. Yesterday, he was being a complete imbecile and today, he peed on Kasta and now he's behaving. It's uber cute.**

**Inspired by the song 'Accidentally in Love' by Counting Crows.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

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_**Accidentally in Love**_

Let me just say that I am not the kind of guy to fall in love. It's always been considered a huge no-no in my world. Don't fall in love. Don't be a good guy. Don't tell the truth. Those are my rules of the road. They're not meant to be broken. Never. I keep those rules intact now too even though I've broken all three of them. Still intact because you never know when you'll need them again. Rules like those are meant to be used and kept at all times, never broken. And I didn't want to break them in the first place, but I blame it on Gwen.

Never tell the truth. I told her the truth. I told her about my dad and I told her about my deals and I told her about my life. I usually lie about all that. I lie because I should and because it feels better than telling the truth and it keeps me from ruining m life and all that.

I was never a good guy because why would I ever want to be a good guy? They never got anything good out of being good. They got in trouble for stupid things. It was kind of bad if you're going to get in trouble for something dumb either way, so being bad just made more sense for me. That way, I was bad no matter what.

And I never fell in love. Obvious reasons.

Gwen ruins all that for me whenever I see her pretty face and whenever I see her smile at me.

"Kevin?" She's looking up from her science work and her eyes are shining at me with that familiar gleam in them that I both love and hate. These are the reasons I fell in love with her. Those glittering eyes, the way she said my name, the way she looked beyond my past and only looked into the future. "Why are we sitting inside?"

I shrug and stare out into the sun-filled day with the wind blustering through the branches of the massive trees that dot her front yard with leaves of emerald green, the same shade of those sparkling emerald eyes. It is a nice day, sure. And she's studying, so it's better to be inside for her sake just so she doesn't get distracted. "Dunno. 'cause we have air conditioning in here?" My response is weak and I know it. Still, it's the truth. We _do_ have air conditioning in her house.

She replies again with a shrug of her own before diving back into her science book, poring over every detail of the thing. Her jade gaze skims over every word on every page and she's taking in the steps of chemical reactions and all that junk that I know most people find boring.

Does _she _find it boring?

Maybe she does. Maybe she doesn't. Should I know these things? Yeah, I probably should. I stand up from where I'm sitting at her desk, just watching her as she lays on her bed and studies like a little student with no other life. But Gwen does have another life. The Anodite life and then the girl who's into me life. There's three Gwens but I know which two I like best. "You wanna go outside?"

"Studying," she says, not glancing up from her book. Although the way she asked before made it sound like she wanted to go outside. "I should really stay inside and keep at this. I have a huge chemistry test tomorrow and I really should review for it."

I look out the side window that gets a little bit of the backyard's grass over the fence that shields it from the prying eyes that pass through the front yard. And I see a trampoline. "How about you learn about gravity instead?" I offer, pointing a thumb over my shoulder in the direction of the trampoline. "It'll be more fun than… this."

She raises an eyebrow, props herself up on her elbows a bit more to see what I'm talking about, and then a smile poses itself across her luscious lips. "Fine." Her delicate little fingers mark the page with a dogear. Then she bounces off her bed and towards the door to her room with me right behind her and ready for some fun because I haven't had fun for a while now. My day has been boring and a trampoline is definitely very appealing to a bored guy.

Once we're out there, she slips out of her ballet flats and leaves them on the ocean of green grass blades that blanket her yard before hoisting herself up onto the trampoline with two hands placed on the metal ring that holds the thing taut. She does a little flip up onto it and lands with her feet slamming into the middle of it and her lithe little body is automatically flying up into the air.

Yes, I keep an acrobat handy. Her name's Gwen and she's all mine.

I kick off my combat boots and haul myself up onto the large canvas that keeps tossing her up into the air, making her crimson hair fly up around her face. I automatically feel the thing bouncing under me because of Gwen, but I'm trying to keep my balance. For the record, not many people have trampolines in New York and I'll just say that I've never really been on one for more than ten minutes. And now I'm on one with my gorgeous Tennyson who's literally the most acrobatic girl I know and she's definitely going to show me up.

It takes me a few seconds to get the rhythm of the thing. Then I'm bouncing on it with Gwen, the two of us going up and down at the same time, keeping eye contact and loving every second of the sunshine. It's April and the rest of the week is supposed to be horribly rainy. I look forward to rain so I don't have to go outside, but I know that Gwen likes the sun. I'm fine with the sun, but I don't love it the way she loves it.

"Much better than studying," she tells me with a little giggle hanging onto her voice as she flips in the air, her form twisting before landing perfectly again before rising once more to bounce in sync with me. "This was a great idea." Her crimson locks are floating in the air and then the rest of her is bouncing up to meet them again.

"Told ya so." It's such a classic phrase that I can't help but say it. I love knowing that I'm right. It always makes my day to be right.

She gives me a little glare and then reaches out to punch me, her fist striking my shoulder and setting me off balance. Now I love trampolines, but I'm kind of uncoordinated when it comes to falling while in the air and trying to land straight and Gwen had pretty much pushed me so I was falling awkwardly (me and trampolines are no longer friends…) and I leaned forward a little too much, grabbing Gwen-

We landed in a compromising situation. A very, very compromising situation. It's the middle of summer, some of us are trying to keep the teen hormones at bay while others are basking in them and I'm ready to keep them at bay, but being on top of Gwen right there with her hair splayed out all over the black canvas of the trampoline really got my mind racing.

That was when I knew I'd broken my third rule. I didn't want to fall in love. Never really planned on it. But when it happened right there, I knew it and it hit me like a ton of bricks. I hate bricks.

Gwen gasps in a breath of the warm summer air, but doesn't seem to mind the position we're in with her beneath me and my shadow shielding her from the sun's beams of gold. She just stares up into my eyes and into my face. "You did that on purpose."

"In my defense," I answer, "I don't usually do trampolines."

She smiles widely and then I push myself off of her and back to standing up on the unstable ground that the massive circular surface provides. Then Gwen props herself up on her elbows. "You're such a city boy."

"And you're very suburban," remarked right back, trying to get back into the feel of the bouncing. It actually was kind of fun. "It balances out in some sort of alternate universe." I keep bouncing up and down, watching her body jump a little bit with every wave of force that jolted through the ebony canvas.

Gwen didn't even bother with retorting something smart-alecky to that. She just let out a content sigh and laid back in the sunshine, her body stretched out across the expanse of black that was the trampoline. Her curvy body was clearly defined and her legs were stretched out, so long and perfect in every way. Her red hair stood out like a lighthouse on a foggy night, as bright as the sun against the dark trampoline. She was just so gorgeous, so radiant. I was really driving myself insane.

We don't talk much after that, but I almost wish we were in that situation from before so I could have an opportunity to kiss her. I want to like her because she's fun and she's the right girl for me, not just because I love her body. And maybe she wasn't just learning gravity when we were out here. Maybe I was learning about chemistry. Of a different kind.

I keep bouncing and she keeps watching the sky as the wispy white clouds drift in the sea of cerulean that hangs above everyone's heads. I keep breaking my rules over and over again, telling the truth, being a good guy, and falling in love. On accident, of course.

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**A/N: Fin. Enjoyed it? I did. Took me a while. All day, actually… Wow, it's kind of late. Um, review please?**

**~Sky**


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